As Brené Brown reminds us, "Courage starts with showing up and letting ourselves be seen'. This is exactly what was done recently by a community of women.
Together, some thirty women defined what owning our courage IS, and how we'd know we actually ARE. We examined situations where we DON'T. We discovered some of the main BLOCKS and WHAT'S MISSING. We identified those areas we most WANT TO TRANSFORM, and what sort of a difference that
would make. Finally, a number of women also took on a PERSONAL CHALLENGE over the next four weeks: to own their courage in an area that would make a real difference for them.
Now the challenge is staying connected with the vision, doing what it takes, and setting up the structures to enable that to happen.
Scroll down to see main points from the evening.
How do I define owning my courage?
- Walking out from my house feeling safe
- Public speaking
- Recognising it in myself
- Being authentic about my own courage in the company of others (not downplaying it etc)
- Accepting acknowledgment from others
- Acknowledging my commitment and knowing I DID follow through
- Overcoming my limiting beliefs
- Fearlessness and conviction - would be happening more organically
- Knowing that it's okay to have fear - and not having it running you
- Speaking up, doing the hard thing (advocacy)
- Doing what is the right thing to do
- Being mindful of my self sabotage
- Loving self, working to a plan.
Where do we own our courage?
- Making a permanent separation
- Leaving a dire do-or-die situation to live in another country
- When we see injustice, take action - and take on being the whistleblower
- In the ordinary actions. Instead of diminishing them, we remember them for next time
Why don't we own our courage?
- Societal beliefs
- Lack of willingness to make mistakes - and to live through the costs
- Guilt - questioning should you be putting your energy elsewhere?
- Fear of standing out
- Lack of direction or plans
- We've been groomed by home experiences / upbringing, so that we think this is normal
- Money - finding an income
- Obligations, responsibilities, demands on time and energy
What are the blocks in the way?
- We feel inadequate.
- We're running from the belief that I don't really deserve good things
- We're living from a space of low self esteem
- We've learnt to make ourselves look small
- Belief that we shouldn't act like we feel good about ourselves
- Need to change our self perception
- Financial necessity keeps us in a situation.
- When we are feeling there is no hope.
What's missing, that needs to be present?
- Conviction - belief in myself that I can do it.
- Belief that other people want what I have to offer.
- Worth - acknowledgement of the value of what you want to do.
- Self worth: the social and recognised value of what you do and what you want to do.
- We need to have plans / goals / a catalyst
- We need a wife - a supportive partner / coach / mentor / support.
- Waking up and breathing each day, being present
- Time and energy and creativity
- Recognition that we can't afford not to move forward.
Where would I most like to create ownership of my courage?
- Have more confidence and let go of being stopped by the fear
- Stop being a perfectionist!
- Love and be kinder to myself / accept myself and befriend my inner critics
- Be present, being more mindful and having a peaceful mind
- Be more playful and creative
- Take more time for myself
- Spend time with mentors and those who will support me stepping into my courage
From tonight, one thing I'll do to make a difference for my life / world?
- Keep on writing.
- Make a plan for where I want to be.
- Be kinder, more self supportive of myself when I'm stepping into courage.
- Ask for help / support.
- Build more strength.
- Get up, walk out the front door. Repeat daily.
- Acknowledge that I'm growing in awareness.